What's made you smile today?

[StevenRB45]

I think at this point the to do list is...

1. Identify if it's the wheel or tyre when it goes in for TPS (next Tuesday week as it's the Citroëns turn for a garage sabbatical this week) as they are likely to need the break the beads and remount anyway.
2. If it's the tyre...book it in for tyres, if the rim is bent book a local guy to come out and straighten the wheel (60 quid and they'll come to me)...then book it in for tyres but at my leisure.

I should say it's absolutely drivable at low speeds it's bob on but there's something just a little odd going on at motorway... not bad enough that your immediate reaction is to stop driving it but also a vague something isn't quite right here feeling.

 

[Pugglt Auld Jock]

I think at this point the to do list is...

1. Identify if it's the wheel or tyre when it goes in for TPS (next Tuesday week as it's the Citroëns turn for a garage sabbatical this week) as they are likely to need the break the beads and remount anyway.
2. If it's the tyre...book it in for tyres, if the rim is bent book a local guy to come out and straighten the wheel (60 quid and they'll come to me)...then book it in for tyres but at my leisure.

I should say it's absolutely drivable at low speeds it's bob on but there's something just a little odd going on at motorway... not bad enough that your immediate reaction is to stop driving it but also a vague something isn't quite right here feeling.

If it's a poorly seated bead it may just suddenly pop out and seat properly as you're driving - which may or may not affect the balance.

 

[The Panda Nut]

Cast iron bathtub removed by Panda power! Along with loads of bags of rubbish and wood. I also dropped my mower round for repair. As I got back in the car and twisted slightly my back did a tiny crick and mercifully has improved enormously,,,,, to bad. Progress!

 

[portland_bill]

Cast iron bathtub removed by Panda power! Along with loads of bags of rubbish and wood. I also dropped my mower round for repair. As I got back in the car and twisted slightly my back did a tiny crick and mercifully has improved enormously,,,,, to bad. Progress!

In 1972, at my first job in a garage, there was strangely, a cast iron bathtub, needing disposal. No idea how it came to be at the garage, but three guys were hammering at it, with quite large hammers, making a lot of noise, but apart from chipping the enamel, having no other effect. Tired of the noise, the boss wandered up, took a 2ld ball pein hammer from oone of the guys, walked around the bath, pondered, then hit it once, with the ball of the hammer. It fell into about 5 pieces. All about hitting the stress point. Learnt a lot from him, about using the brain before the limbs.

 

[portland_bill]

Fresh MOT for the Fabia, all clean.
One down, two to go.

 

[Pugglt Auld Jock]

In 1972, at my first job in a garage, there was strangely, a cast iron bathtub, needing disposal. No idea how it came to be at the garage, but three guys were hammering at it, with quite large hammers, making a lot of noise, but apart from chipping the enamel, having no other effect. Tired of the noise, the boss wandered up, took a 2ld ball pein hammer from oone of the guys, walked around the bath, pondered, then hit it once, with the ball of the hammer. It fell into about 5 pieces. All about hitting the stress point. Learnt a lot from him, about using the brain before the limbs.

The boss of the wee BL country garage I worked in was, on the surface, a tough, very dour, serious chap who very seldom smiled. However, once you got to know him you discovered he did have a sense of humour. I remember on one occasion he was questioning the apprentice - there was only one apprentice most of the time - who was working in the next bay to mine - about a cylinder head overhaul (burnt exhaust valve I seem to remember) he was helping with. "Did you do a compression test before you started son"? The poor unfortunate, who hadn't been with us long, replied "I don't think so sir". "Well how are you going to know if it's fixed when you've finished? Better get one done before you go any further". "How am I going to do that without the head in place"? the poor lad asked. "Och, don't they teach you anything at the college these days"? Willy (the boss) came back with. "Go to the stores and get a sheet of brown compression paper and a tin of grease". The storeman, who'd been with the garage for many years, was in on it of course and gave him a sheet of ordinary brown paper and a tub of grease, telling him to "get it right first time as that was the last sheet of compression paper he had". The lad appeared back on the job and the boss told him to clean up the block face till it was nice and shiny to get a good seal then apply a light coat of grease and smooth the compression paper perfectly flat over the block face. When he was happy it was perfectly flat and sealed with the grease all round he was to spin the engine on the starter. "If the compression is good it'll pop a hole in the paper over each piston" - "Make sure the paper's nice and flat now or you won't get a good seal and some of the compression will leak out and that'll just be a waste of the compression paper". By now all work in the shop had stopped and everyone was watching this poor boy cleaning up the bock face and installing the brown paper. I honestly can't remember whether it did pop a hole over each bore or not but the poor lad had his leg pulled about it for the rest of his "time". There was no "nastiness" about it but it was useful to keep him in his place on the odd occasion when he got a bit above himself.

I wonder if this sort of thing still goes on now a days or is it all too P.C.

 

[porta]

The boss of the wee BL country garage I worked in was, on the surface, a tough, very dour, serious chap who very seldom smiled. However, once you got to know him you discovered he did have a sense of humour. I remember on one occasion he was questioning the apprentice - there was only one apprentice most of the time - who was working in the next bay to mine - about a cylinder head overhaul (burnt exhaust valve I seem to remember) he was helping with. "Did you do a compression test before you started son"? The poor unfortunate, who hadn't been with us long, replied "I don't think so sir". "Well how are you going to know if it's fixed when you've finished? Better get one done before you go any further". "How am I going to do that without the head in place"? the poor lad asked. "Och, don't they teach you anything at the college these days"? Willy (the boss) came back with. "Go to the stores and get a sheet of brown compression paper and a tin of grease". The storeman, who'd been with the garage for many years, was in on it of course and gave him a sheet of ordinary brown paper and a tub of grease, telling him to "get it right first time as that was the last sheet of compression paper he had". The lad appeared back on the job and the boss told him to clean up the block face till it was nice and shiny to get a good seal then apply a light coat of grease and smooth the compression paper perfectly flat over the block face. When he was happy it was perfectly flat and sealed with the grease all round he was to spin the engine on the starter. "If the compression is good it'll pop a hole in the paper over each piston" - "Make sure the paper's nice and flat now or you won't get a good seal and some of the compression will leak out and that'll just be a waste of the compression paper". By now all work in the shop had stopped and everyone was watching this poor boy cleaning up the bock face and installing the brown paper. I honestly can't remember whether it did pop a hole over each bore or not but the poor lad had his leg pulled about it for the rest of his "time". There was no "nastiness" about it but it was useful to keep him in his place on the odd occasion when he got a bit above himself.

I wonder if this sort of thing still goes on now a days or is it all too P.C.

There’s always ribbing, one of my mates is a lad who was my apprentice back in the 90’s, and he says the same ‘nonsense tasks’ are still given out and pranks played.
I think I’ve stated before about one played on me, the infamous ‘go get a bubble for a spirit level’. The workshop foreman gave me some petty cash and off I went on the bus…bottom of Leeds market, off for a pork pie at the market butchers and a pint at the Robin Hood…tootled back in with a bag, got a bolloking for time spent away, foreman opens bag and jaw drops, inside was four spirit level bubbles, ie, the replacement glass spirit level ‘bubbles’ from the hardware stall

 

[irc]

Ahhh, the days of sending kids to the stores for a "long weight", some "sky hooks", or a "left handed screwdriver".
Simpler times...

 

[Pugglt Auld Jock]

Ahhh, the days of sending kids to the stores for a "long weight", some "sky hooks", or a "left handed screwdriver".
Simpler times...

It was a 3/8 inch sky hook with us and all the factors in town were in on it - "Sorry son, we just sold the last one about an hour ago, but Jimmy round at EMF has some" so the poor lad could easily spend half a day going round the factors only to be told they were all out of stock.

I've heard of the "long weight" too but not the "left handed screwdriver", Rather like the idea of a different screwdriver for left handers - or is it for left hand threads?

 

[StevenRB45]

I did a week in Reg Vardys bodyshop when I was 16...(Which I'd pretty much forgotten about until this came up).

In that week there was a wiremesh watering can and some Tartan paint...but given I was on the parts desk all they got given was a number 5 long stand..

 

[porta]

Ahhh, the days of sending kids to the stores for a "long weight", some "sky hooks", or a "left handed screwdriver".
Simpler times...

They still fall for it…even with google at their fingertips

 

[porta]

I think the reason Jim is still my mate is that I only sent him on missions impossible that didn’t involve him wandering round Leeds. Although the bucket of sparks stomped him twice. Being the sparky/diagnostician, I only got the apprentices for one year, so once they were wise to the general pranks, I’d wait till they got the ‘bubble one’ then told them to use the money to get a ‘round of pork pies’ from Stephensons butchers. They’d get a bollocking from the foreman still, but at least we got a free pie

 

[The Panda Nut]

The boss of the wee BL country garage I worked in was, on the surface, a tough, very dour, serious chap who very seldom smiled. However, once you got to know him you discovered he did have a sense of humour. I remember on one occasion he was questioning the apprentice - there was only one apprentice most of the time - who was working in the next bay to mine - about a cylinder head overhaul (burnt exhaust valve I seem to remember) he was helping with. "Did you do a compression test before you started son"? The poor unfortunate, who hadn't been with us long, replied "I don't think so sir". "Well how are you going to know if it's fixed when you've finished? Better get one done before you go any further". "How am I going to do that without the head in place"? the poor lad asked. "Och, don't they teach you anything at the college these days"? Willy (the boss) came back with. "Go to the stores and get a sheet of brown compression paper and a tin of grease". The storeman, who'd been with the garage for many years, was in on it of course and gave him a sheet of ordinary brown paper and a tub of grease, telling him to "get it right first time as that was the last sheet of compression paper he had". The lad appeared back on the job and the boss told him to clean up the block face till it was nice and shiny to get a good seal then apply a light coat of grease and smooth the compression paper perfectly flat over the block face. When he was happy it was perfectly flat and sealed with the grease all round he was to spin the engine on the starter. "If the compression is good it'll pop a hole in the paper over each piston" - "Make sure the paper's nice and flat now or you won't get a good seal and some of the compression will leak out and that'll just be a waste of the compression paper". By now all work in the shop had stopped and everyone was watching this poor boy cleaning up the bock face and installing the brown paper. I honestly can't remember whether it did pop a hole over each bore or not but the poor lad had his leg pulled about it for the rest of his "time". There was no "nastiness" about it but it was useful to keep him in his place on the odd occasion when he got a bit above himself.

I wonder if this sort of thing still goes on now a days or is it all too P.C.

Sadly even before I retired it had all stopped. Some pranks of course weren't funny or safe and the H&S killed it. Also evrrything being charged, and time monitoring having gone quite mad its taken the joy and humour out of work. One of my last bosses used to take pride in stopping people from talking at all. Some places even try and stop people going to the loo. Mrs PN used to go to work having had nothing to drink beforehand because of the inquisition. Frankly its poor management. They say a happy workforce is more productive but many placesseem to disagree. When I started work, they used to engineer a reason to send you to the stores for a long weight..... Yes I fell for it.

 

[The Panda Nut]

In 1972, at my first job in a garage, there was strangely, a cast iron bathtub, needing disposal. No idea how it came to be at the garage, but three guys were hammering at it, with quite large hammers, making a lot of noise, but apart from chipping the enamel, having no other effect. Tired of the noise, the boss wandered up, took a 2ld ball pein hammer from oone of the guys, walked around the bath, pondered, then hit it once, with the ball of the hammer. It fell into about 5 pieces. All about hitting the stress point. Learnt a lot from him, about using the brain before the limbs.

Hit it twice. Just lifted and dropped 7lb hammer. Decided the plughole was key, so I hit the thick ring down and at an angle, and so it proved a good move..

 

[The Panda Nut]

At last, tonight my daughters house has a working boiler. Its been a marathon. Valve block and pressure switches had been leaking and was scrap, all the filters were blocked, combimate had gone to mush and filter was blocked, gas valve sticky, flue and top seals all failed, flow sensor seized. All in it took 4 visits and over 10 hours work from a guy who was clearly on top of his game. His charge was so modest I paid him double. My roofer is back and he had stripped the eaves, replaced the outermost rafter and fascias and soffits before I arrived so looking good. Im very pleased with my wall repairs so far. The repaired parts look and sound solid again. Lashings of steel stitching rods , epoxy resin and cement. Ive added some engineering brick under the first lintel and as far as I can see its now good for hopefully a few more decades. Im in the roof next, to deal with blockwork higher up. Im confident it will be pretty solid once its all done. Touch wood still on budget and ahead of my basic programme. Im hoping for a meal in the house over the christmas period. Im just glad we hadnt ordered kitchen and bathroom from Homebase as they have gone bust today. Im not suprised, big ticket items 0% credit and the best prices. Bread and butter stuff outrageously expensive. Ive walked away many times empty handed for this reason. Maybe a closing down sale in the offing. Imso sad fot folk who will loose their livelihood.

I have found that drilling into the blocks a few inches apart and pumping epoxy into the holes is enlightening. Fill through one hole and it comes out of the other holes the result is profound once its set. Hardly any mess at all. And, my ultra grime wipes remove epoxy like it was flour and water. More sand and cement tomorrow! All I need is my back to let me get on at full speed. (thats quarter speed for anyone else).

 

[HughJarsse]

It was a 3/8 inch sky hook with us and all the factors in town were in on it - "Sorry son, we just sold the last one about an hour ago, but Jimmy round at EMF has some" so the poor lad could easily spend half a day going round the factors only to be told they were all out of stock.

I've heard of the "long weight" too but not the "left handed screwdriver", Rather like the idea of a different screwdriver for left handers - or is it for left hand threads?

Always remember one of the apprentices where we worked was, shall we say, 'a bit lacking' was told by the guy he was working with (in our 2nd year, we were put with experienced fitters to learn) to go to the stores and get him a1/2 inch left handed spanner. The lad wandered off to the stores, and came back with an 'S' spanner (we used them to get into tight corners or difficult places on airframe components assemblies) The guy looked at it, and taking it from him held it up so the head pointed right, and said, 'stupid boy, that's a right handed one, take it back and get a left handed one' said lad toddled off back to the stores, while the rest of us tried not to laugh. (if you turn the 'S' spanner over, it 'hands' the head the opposite way!) Genius!!
Also, a favourite was the 'elbow grease' trick. Send the poor apprentice off to the stores for some 'elbow grease'. Storeman was in on the trick, and always sent them back to ask what size tin he wanted, small, medium, large, or bulk.
Worst one was the sparky's, as they used to get their apprentices to hold the ends of a Megger, whilst they cranked the handle as fast as they could. Hair raising!!

 

[The Panda Nut]

Always remember one of the apprentices where we worked was, shall we say, 'a bit lacking' was told by the guy he was working with (in our 2nd year, we were put with experienced fitters to learn) to go to the stores and get him a1/2 inch left handed spanner. The lad wandered off to the stores, and came back with an 'S' spanner (we used them to get into tight corners or difficult places on airframe components assemblies) The guy looked at it, and taking it from him held it up so the head pointed right, and said, 'stupid boy, that's a right handed one, take it back and get a left handed one' said lad toddled off back to the stores, while the rest of us tried not to laugh. (if you turn the 'S' spanner over, it 'hands' the head the opposite way!) Genius!!
Also, a favourite was the 'elbow grease' trick. Send the poor apprentice off to the stores for some 'elbow grease'. Storeman was in on the trick, and always sent them back to ask what size tin he wanted, small, medium, large, or bulk.
Worst one was the sparky's, as they used to get their apprentices to hold the ends of a Megger, whilst they cranked the handle as fast as they could. Hair raising!!

Oops wrong reaction from ex HSE man. snigger.

 

[bugsymike]

Always remember one of the apprentices where we worked was, shall we say, 'a bit lacking' was told by the guy he was working with (in our 2nd year, we were put with experienced fitters to learn) to go to the stores and get him a1/2 inch left handed spanner. The lad wandered off to the stores, and came back with an 'S' spanner (we used them to get into tight corners or difficult places on airframe components assemblies) The guy looked at it, and taking it from him held it up so the head pointed right, and said, 'stupid boy, that's a right handed one, take it back and get a left handed one' said lad toddled off back to the stores, while the rest of us tried not to laugh. (if you turn the 'S' spanner over, it 'hands' the head the opposite way!) Genius!!
Also, a favourite was the 'elbow grease' trick. Send the poor apprentice off to the stores for some 'elbow grease'. Storeman was in on the trick, and always sent them back to ask what size tin he wanted, small, medium, large, or bulk.
Worst one was the sparky's, as they used to get their apprentices to hold the ends of a Megger, whilst they cranked the handle as fast as they could. Hair raising!!

Company probably made him a manager in the end
When I was at college we had a very cocky assistant lecturer always having a go about tiding up, so I left a spanner connected via a fine wire to the Champion Spark Plug testing machine, he bent to pick it up and I pressed the button!!!
I believe the comment was something like "You bas***d , you could have killed me!"
My other trick was when some was using the same machine I would put my hand across theirs and the spark plug, I was expecting the shock , but they weren't

 

[HughJarsse]

Company probably made him a manager in the end
When I was at college we had a very cocky assistant lecturer always having a go about tiding up, so I left a spanner connected via a fine wire to the Champion Spark Plug testing machine, he bent to pick it up and I pressed the button!!!
I believe the comment was something like "You bas***d , you could have killed me!"
My other trick was when some was using the same machine I would put my hand across theirs and the spark plug, I was expecting the shock , but they weren't

One of our sparky's poked the probes for the megger into the joints in an apprentices toolbox, (small holes in the corners) and waited until he started opening the box (metal ones, one of our apprentice tests was to make a 'barn type' toolbox to use around the shop) before frantically cranking the megger up. Lad was just taking padlock off and had other hand on the metal handle. Lock went off at a fair rate of knots into orbit as he jerked his arm away.
Also, one particular 'abrasive' lad, had his barn toolbox nailed to the bench, (we got it open by punching the pins out of the hinges), nailing it to the bench with 4'' nails, then replaced the pins in the hinges (again, we had to make the hinges as a test of our skills, so knew how to 'dismantle them' if you didn't peen the ends of the bar over) without even disturbing his padlock. He came to take his toolbox over to the next bench, heaved, strained, and started getting well stoked up. It wasn't obvious what we had done, he was swearing and cursing fit to bust a gut. Only when he actually opened it, and took the inner tray of tools out, could he see the nail heads.
Those were the days..

 

[The Panda Nut]

Company probably made him a manager in the end
When I was at college we had a vhing like "You bas***d , you could have killed me!"
My other trick was when some was using the same machine I would put my hand across theirs and the spark plug, I was expecting the shock , but they weren't

You bas***d you could have killed him!